Millennials avoid malignant malls

Posted on Nov 4 2015 - 10:34am by Scott Schroder

Our generation does a lot of things poorly. We ignore wrongdoing, feign outrage, are generally passive in many important matters and are not as politically literate as we should be. We don’t vote as often as we should and plenty else.

But we also don’t hang out in malls anymore.

We, as a generation, have realized that the mall is not a good place. The mall is not a destination for fun.

Places that are more fun than the mall for a teenager to hang out at include, but are not limited to: coffee shops, restaurants, parks, your friends’ houses, rivers and beaches, sporting events and probably even school.

Why have teenagers quit hanging out at the mall? Because the mall is sterile. The mall is for taking your money. It is a point of purchase nestled deep within a barrage of advertisements.

The mall of our childhood was a vapid, cultureless, mayonnaise-laced place for good young americans to do wholesome things such as exchanging money for goods and/or services and definitely nothing else.

In the mall, you can be with your four best friends, your favorite beverage can be in your hand, it can be the weekend — and still every window, every sign is reminding you of what you don’t have. You can never be materially content in the mall. Worse yet, you are not supposed to be.

It’s downright insidious, actually, which is probably why it has finally been rejected wholesale as a place to voluntarily spend time.

But no more is the mall anything more than an unfortunate errand. Victory is ours. Look around: You are among the first generation in several to say no to the mall. You and your “Americans aged 18-25” demographic have defeated this scourge.

The mall menace plagued this country for too long, but the end of the mall is near. Of course there are other specters to consider; some have been there all along and some are new, but know that in this very specific way, you are leaving behind a better world.

Maybe we are not the cultural vanguards America deserves, but we are the ones she needs.

Scott Schroder is a senior political science major from Houston.