Friday morning I read the terrible news that Ty Laporte was killed in a car crash. I was almost brought to tears, and I didn’t understand why. I never knew Ty and she never knew me. I put my phone down in my lap and thought about how many classmates have died during my time here as a student.
The number of funerals, memorials and vigils I have attended is heartbreaking. I’ve watched friends’ hearts shatter. I’ve watched parents sob uncontrollably. I’ve seen brothers and sisters say goodbye to a sibling one last time. Experiencing the impact one person has on his or her community is devastating. Tears, smiles and laughter are always the ways in which we remember those we have lost.
When we lose someone we know, it’s not fair. It doesn’t seem right to have your friends ripped away from you, especially unexpectedly, but don’t let them die. Let them live in your memories. Let them live in your laughter. Let them live in your smile. Let who they were affect who you are. Take everything they taught you and teach everyone who was not lucky enough to be warmed by their love.
But when it’s someone you, personally, haven’t lost, how do you address the grief you see in those around you?
Sometimes the pain we see in others hurts us. So many people in our Ole Miss family are in mourning. I can’t imagine the pain many of you are experiencing or have experienced. I can’t imagine losing a part of yourself. And we want to mourn together. We are all a part of the Ole Miss family and when one of us dies, we all feel the repercussions, the loss. My words here will never articulate the beauty of the lives we have lost. But I hope they make you understand that you do not mourn alone because losing a friend that you’ve never had can and will change your life.
Ty, I wish we were friends. I wish I had known you because I know those on whom you made a lasting impression. We miss you, we love you and I look forward to meeting you one day.
