Greetings little stars,
My name is McKenna Wierman, and starting next week, the Daily Mississippian will have an astrology column. I have studied the stars, the planets and their power over the human soul for many years. I consider myself to be especially in tune with the forces of the Universe and the energetic powers which move the University.
In preparation, use these dates to find your sign:
Aries, the Ram: March 21 – April 19
A fire sign with a fire personality. On a bad day, you’d call them selfish, but they’re really just ambitious. Many Aries have curly brown hair; others have straight black hair and are named Alex. Aries head-butt any issue, and make excellent partners for group projects. They are extremely passionate, and often develop headaches as a result of their head-butting.
Taurus, the Bull: April 20 – May 20
The notoriously stubborn and strong Taurus is the first of the earth signs. Taurus can be hella resistant to change. They are often seen wearing jeans every day of the week, or, in the colder months, walking around campus in shorts while it is snowing. This isn’t really a surprise, though, and Taurus are usually the most attractive of all the signs, so they can pull off wearing the exact same outfit pretty much every day. They also tend to hold onto things of sentimental value, like cardboard boxes, old tests and used paper towels.
Gemini, the Twins: May 21 – June 20
I personally have yet to meet any twins born under this air sign, but that should not come as any shock. Gemini are the first of the air signs, and are often swept away by the wind. Some famous Gemini included Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and her little dog, too. Gemini can be indecisive and take time to choose what they want. They also have a knack for standing in front of you in line for lunch when you are in a hurry.
Cancer, the Crab: June 21 – July 22
As the first of the water signs, Cancer is water in its most basic form. Cancers often wear leggings with oversized t-shirts or baseball caps, even when they are inside. Cancers are generally nurturing and kind, but be careful of their temper, because they are known to pinch.
Leo, the Lion: July 23 – August 22
A Leo is always the center of attention and loves to be in control. They have a hard time using their inside voices, but they always have something cheerful to say. Leos are ticklish and athletic. A true Leo will have a beard; any Leo without a beard isn’t a true Leo. I’m sorry.
Virgo, the Virgin: August 23 – September 22
A rare occurrence around campus, Virgo is the second earth sign. They are sensitive and hold many secrets. In many ways, they are very much like the Grove: their beauty extends beyond their physical appearance and runs deep within their character. And they get trashed at football games.
Libra, the Scale: September 23 – October 22
Libra is the sign of peace and order, and they love to bring harmony to every situation. They are excellent planners and good friends. Since Libra is an air sign, talking to a Libra comes as naturally as breathing. Libras actually love being talked to, as they feed off the carbon dioxide you exhale. Many Libras are plants.
Scorpio, the Scorpion: October 23 – November 21
Every Scorpio is born with the same amount of power and energy in their bodies. The smaller the Scorpio, the more concentrated that power is. Fiery passion is constantly burning within them. Subsequently, you’ll often find that Scorpios are especially susceptible to outbursts of creativity, anger, or hunger. Steer clear of a hangry Scorpio.
Sagittarius, the Archer: November 22 – December 21
The most gentle of the fire signs, Sagittarians are often philosophical and free-thinking. They are creative and intelligent, yet incredibly patient. They will drive you literally anywhere and never ask for gas money.
Capricorn, the Goat: December 22 – January 19
Capricorn, the last of the earth signs, is very close to nature and the earth. They often have more than one side to their personality: a fun-loving side and a super creepy side. Like their animal representation, they are steadfast and don’t like to stop working on a task until it is completed. They are hardworking and serious, but don’t like to wear shoes.
Aquarius, the Water Bearer: January 20 – February 18
All Aquarians are super cool and awesome. Some may call them distant, but those people are usually standing far away. They are unique, sometimes eccentric, and they tend to buy the same pair of shorts, just in different colors. All Aquarians have psychic powers.
Pisces, the Fish: February 19 – March 20
Last, but not least, Pisces are charming and inspirational. They are emotional burritos, sometimes so overstuffed with feels that they require two tortillas. Pisces as friends or partners can be a little hard to reel in, but once you’ve caught one, they will grant you three wishes if you promise to throw them back into the sea.
Tune in next week for your horoscope. Until then, keep reaching for the stars.
